Alli (alligator06) wrote in mormon_boys,
Alli
alligator06
mormon_boys

  • Mood:
This has nothing to do w/ boys, but I've been thinking about something lately and I want some input.. I didn't post this on my LJ cuz I didn't want just anyone to read it. I want to know what you guys think.

On Saturday, my mom got a phone call that her friend (who's had cancer for a really long time)doesn't have much time left and that she's expected to die that night. My mom was really upset, and so I still don't know whether she has actually died yet or not, but the doctors expected her to die this weekend if not that night. Up until saturday she seemed fine. She was walking around and it seemed like she was getting better. Since I found out about her cancer, I've been praying for her every night...

This was kinda the same as with my grandpa. He seemed to be doing better, but I prayed for him every single night. One night I forgot to say my prayers. The next day was the day he was life-flighted into the hospital. He died that night while I was with him. I felt somewhat responsible because I thought that my lack of prayers that one night had something to do w/ my grandpa dying. After a while I realized that it was just a coincidence, and everyone forgets a prayer once in a while...

Well, friday night.. I was really tired and I said my prayers but I was so worried about my CC meet the next day that I forgot to pray for this woman. The next day was the day my mom got that phone call. Is it really coincidence? Like.. I don't know if you can even imagine the guilt i feel. Its like I was responsible for the lives of 2
people and I blew it. Is that even possible though? How could it happen to me twice, and still be coincidence? Does coincidence even exist?

I can't even describe how bad this whole thing is making me feel. What do you guys think?
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic
  • 5 comments